HILARIOUS STORIES

This should make you laugh!

A Minneapolis couple decided to go to Florida to thaw out during a
particularly icy winter. They planned to stay at the same hotel where
they had spent their honeymoon 20 years earlier.

Because of hectic schedules, it was difficult to coordinate their
travel schedules, so the husband left Minnesota and flew to Florida
on Thursday, with his wife flying down the following day.

The husband checked into the hotel. There was a computer in his room,
so he decided to send an email to his wife. However, he accidentally
left out one letter in her email address, and without realizing his
error, sent the email.

Meanwhile, somewhere in Houston, a widow had just returned home from
her husband’s funeral. He was a minister who was called home to glory
following a heart attack. The widow decided to check her email
expecting messages from relatives and friends. After reading the
first message, she screamed and fainted. The widow’s son rushed into the
room, found his mother on the floor, and saw the computer screen which
read:

To: My Loving Wife
Subject: I’ve Arrived
Date: October 16, 2004

I know you’re surprised to hear from me. They have computers here now
and you are allowed to send emails to your loved ones. I’ve just
arrived and have been checked in. I see that everything has been
prepared for your arrival tomorrow. Looking forward to seeing you
then! Hope your journey is as uneventful as mine was.

P.S. Sure is hot down here.

..................................................................................

Some more shorties:

1. WILL THE REAL DUMMY PLEASE STAND UP? AT & T fired President John Walter after nine months, saying he lacked intellectual leadership. He received a $26 million severance package. Perhaps it’s not Walter who’s lacking intelligence.

2. WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM OUR FRIENDS: Police in Oakland, California spent two hours attempting to subdue a gunman who had barricaded himself inside his home. After firing ten tear gas canisters, officers discovered that the man was standing beside them in the police line, shouting, "Please come out and give yourself up."

3. WHAT WAS PLAN B??? An Illinois man, pretending to have a gun, kidnapped a motorist and forced him to drive to two different automated teller machines, wherein the kidnapper proceeded to withdraw money from his own bank accounts.

4. THE GETAWAY!  A man walked into a Topeka, Kansas Kwik Stop, and asked for all the money in the cash drawer. Apparently, the take was too small, so he tied up the store clerk and worked the counter himself for three hours until police showed up and grabbed him.

5. DID I SAY THAT??? Police in Los Angeles had good luck with a robbery suspect who just couldn’t control himself during a lineup. When detectives asked each man in the lineup to repeat the words: "Give me all your money or I’ll shoot," the man shouted, "That’s not what I said!"

6. ARE WE COMMUNICATING?? A man spoke frantically into the phone, "My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart!" "Is this her first child?" the doctor asked. "No!" the man shouted, "This is her husband!

7. NOT THE SHARPEST TOOL IN THE SHED!! In Modesto, California, Steven Richard King was arrested for trying to hold up a Bank of America branch without a weapon. King used a thumb and a finger to simulate a gun, but unfortunately, he failed to keep his hand in his pocket. (hellllllooooooo?!)

8. THE GRAND FINALE’ Last summer, down on Lake Isabella, located in the high desert, an hour east of Bakersfield, California, some folks, new to boating, were having a problem. No matter how hard they tried, they couldn’t get their brand new 22 ft. boat going. It was very sluggish in almost every maneuver, no matter how much power was applied. After about an hour of trying to make it go, they putted to a near by marina, thinking someone there could tell them what was wrong. A thorough topside check revealed everything in perfect working condition. The engine ran fine, the out drive went up and down, and the prop was the correct size and pitch. So, one of the marina guys jumped in the water to check underneath. He came up choking on water, he was laughing so hard. NOW REMEMBER... THIS IS TRUE! Under the boat, still strapped securely in place, was the trailer.’’ :-)